I failed a lot of times.
I made mistakes. I have lots of regrets.
I miss my daddy. I have not moved on from his passing.
I cry in all of the movies with scenes with daddies in it.
I cry when I hear songs that he likes. I still cry so hard when I see all his favorite things.
I still ask for forgiveness.And I Don't think I will ever be forgiven.
I hurt him so much. I disappointed him so much.
I long for that chance again to show him how much I love him.
I am a failure.
People say I am smart and I always know what to do.
But that is not me anymore.
I am tired.
If not only for this one single soul who needs me in her life...
I am giving up. Since I am no good. But in her eyes, I am the best.
So maybe at least, just her at least...
I will try not to disappoint her.
I will hold on to this chance to prove my worth to her.
To not commit the same mistakes again.
I will try not to fail again.
My heart is not ok.
There is no more denying that my heart is hurt.
And tired. Perhaps.
My heart is giving up.
Literally and figuratively.
I loved so much it hurts.
I am loved so much... It hurts.
Love equals hatred.
Mistakes are not forgiven.
I lost my chances.
I thank my lucky stars for everything.
I am not well liked for sure. By a lot.
Even my fb posts are not well liked.
I know I have a few, that I've touched lives.
I know someday, I'll have a few who'd smile for me.
Laugh with me. Be proud of me.
I know I Have been true, brave and happy.
I don't care if they stare, or if they step back.
I will still be me. Fat and frank!
Even if it is too late. I'll try to change my fate.
For my grounded wounded heart, I am fighting.
This time, Im claiming my last chance.
This time it is gonna be me!
Thursday, April 2, 2015
Merciful God, release us from the time of trial and oppression, that we may witness to the eternal hope of grief becoming joy and life rising from death.
Holy week in Baliuag has always been festive, venerated and most of all, awaited.
For how many years, the town proper of Baliuag Bulacan always have about 100 or more carrozas or karo every Holy Week.
It is from this inspiration that our parish, Sto. Rosario de Makinabang, of Baliuag, Bulacan - 6 years ago, started to have our own Holy Week procession. Every Holy Wednesday and Good Friday, the carrozas walk the stretch of our main road. we started with merely 6 karos, but now, we are proud to have about 35 carrozas now. This was made possible by several devotees and volunteers. All the karos in our procession are owned by families that are active in the parish. As family volunteers that wanted to join, it is not a question of how big or small, how simple or extravagant, or who is who, that joins the procession. thus, the solemness and importance of the season is vastly observed. We commemorate the passion of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ through our own way, not to merely perform idolatry, but to pay respect to the traditions of our religion.
here are the 2015 Holy Week Procession in Makinabang.
You are my Life! You are my inspiration.
Everytime I get praises and people tell me that My Niña Emilia is being raised well, has manners and breeding, and that you are such a good girl - you just don't know it but I am sooo flattered and thankful that Mama Mary helped me to raise you that well.
I must have done something so good in my life to deserve you as my gift. You are so sweet and topakin, you are smart and yet so kalog. You are so kikay and feeling artista!!!
I can see how you are as a woman soon, coz this early you give advices to me to be strong. You are growing up to be my bestfriend.
You rock my world Nea. You will ways be my superstar!!!
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Ever since I was around 10 years old, we have been visiting this orphanage.
It was here where my first exposure for our Sto. Rosario church in Makinabang was held.
It was here where my first catechetical guild outreach program was held.
It was here where I finally became a "parent"!
I have been frequenting this place for many years already. but this October 2014 visit was different.
we came back! we came big. we came - A lot!
My uncles joined me, my grandmother was with us too. My Ninang Delia and my Uncle Thippa from NY was with me too.
We brought lots of stuff for the children and for the whole house. We also have packed foods which we shared altogether.
as always, a visit to Bethany is a knock on my head. it is always a reminder that I do not have the right to question my God for all my "undelivered" wishes!
I have visited several houses already, I have to say that the kids here are all behaved, sweet and really respectful.
One thing nice during our visit is, when we were there, a group of policemen and women from Camp Alejo in Malolos City came too. They brought some packed foods as well, They also have diapers, groceries and a lot more. The best news is, all these came from all of their donations - from their own packets. We salute you sirs and mams!!!
here are the contact details for Bethany. I hope you can also come and visit them.
Please get in touch with their directress, Sr. Analyn. She is very kind and accommodating. I've known her for about 12 years already since when she was just a young nun attending to the kids, now, she became the directress already.
BETHANY HOUSE ORPHANAGE
Tabe, Guiguinto, Bulacan, Philippines
Contact Nos.: (63)-044-794 0200 / 044-690 2163